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Boobie Washer

On Fridays I sometimes post stupid little things.  This would be one of those…

I found an application submitted for “Boobie Washer” on the bathroom counter. I do not remember placing that particular “Help Wanted” ad.  “Knee Polisher,” sure. I think most people spend a good part of their lives looking for a good knee polisher. But “Boobie Washer?” Ludicrous.

I’m assuming my husband left it there, hopefully for me.  His credentials are less than stellar, but it is the only application I’ve received so far.

$500 per boob seems excessive, though.


Amy Vansant

Voted Funniest Non-Mommy Blog by a Bunch of Moms I Got Really Drunk.Amy has been finding creative ways to make no money since high school.

21 Responses

  1. Abby

    I would like to know why he feels you need to wash your boobs only once a week. This disturbs me only slightly more than the fact that he rides armadillos.
    Abby recently posted..Letting It Go
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  2. Brandon, from My Own Private Idaho

    If he can only do Mondays, I can come in and help on the weekends (and an occasional weekday when I’m not working).

    I have references!

    I have a resume a mile long. In college, not only was I a boobie washer, but I also did booty buffing on the side.

    The moment when you’ve shined an ass so well you can see your reflection? A proud moment indeed.
    Brandon, from My Own Private Idaho recently posted..Stand Up Comics and My Ex Wife (starring @JohnHeffron!)

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  3. Amy B

    Where are these 2 armadillos parked? I’m a little nervous about this. They’re messy. Everything else seems like pretty standard language…
    Amy B recently posted..Another Reminder

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  4. Callie's Mariner

    Is this the only application you got? Perhaps you should hold out for a less lazy Boobie Washer.

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