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Creepy Little Attic Doors

“Nope, can’t live here.”

I looked at him, exhausted. This was the 25th home we’ve seen and the most promising by far.

“Why not?” I asked, trying to keep my voice from growing screechy.

He nodded to the far wall.

“Creepy little crawlspace door.”

In the corner of the second floor bedroom stood a door no more than two feet high.

“More specifically,” he said, pointing to the doorknob. “It has a doorknob, not a one-sided latch.”

“So?” I asked.

Our real estate agent walked to the door, her 32-tooth grin never wavering. She reached for the knob. My husband winced as she opened it. It revealed nothing but wooden beams and attic fluff.

My husband took a deep breath. I stared at him, awaiting further explanation why an attic door with a knob meant weeks of additional house hunting.

“A latch on the inside is one thing,” he said. “WHY WOULD YOU GIVE THEM KNOB TO COME IN?”



Amy Vansant

Amy Vansant

Amy Vansant is a USA Today and Wall Street Journal Best-Selling author specializing in fun, funny fiction --- even the murder mysteries.
Amy Vansant

14 Responses

    • Amy Vansant

      Did she eagerly ask if you’d cut yourself, or maybe gotten a splinter why you were in there? There was probably a certain amount of blood that had to be spilled in there to keep it from eating the house.
      Amy Vansant recently posted..Slightly Stalky


  1. Lance

    I will admit, I wasn’t always the best older brother. My younger sister is claustrophobic and as a little kid, had adeal with monsters hiding everywhere.

    I may or may not have pulled the “tricking your sister intoa small creepy attic or basement door then locking he rin for a few seconds”

    God has forgiven me, my sister hasn’t
    Lance recently posted..Hard To Beat


  2. Dusty

    You need that doornob to come back from John Malcovich’s mind! You don’t want to end up on the Jersey Turnpike every time, do you?


  3. Jessica

    We have a creepy little door in our Dining room and I begged my husband to nail it shut. I know a little tiny gnome creature lives in there and is waiting for the right moment to scurry out into the family room while I’m watching Project Runway.
    Jessica recently posted..Blargh


  4. Michelle H.

    I have to side with him on this. That little door is nothing but nightmare fuel waiting to happen. Now, I will admit, if I had been the previous owner of the home, I would have had to find and buy the creepiest clown statue I could possibly find, and stick it right on the other side of that door. So that when the person showing the house opened it…well, you get the picture.
    Add your Twitter:


  5. Chris

    You need a doornob to get back out of John Malcovich’s mind. You don’t want to end up on the Jersey Turnpike every time, do you?



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