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Why You Shouldn’t Mix Manhattans with Wine

  1. You wake up and it sounds like there is a tiny woman in your skull screaming at the top of her lungs while she rips out chunks of your brain.
  2. You stumble out to find the kitchen and living room covered in empty wine bottles, glasses, playing cards and heartburn medicine bottles.
  3. You burst into tears watching Olympic synchronized swimming, which immediately shifts into uncontrollable giggles at how stupid you are.
  4. About the time you get that under control, you burst into tears watching an inspirational Nike commercial. You ask your husband to put you down.
  5. You check your email and find this photo you sent yourself from the night before of your husband playing knife games with your friend.

Please send help.

Amy Vansant

Amy Vansant

Author Amy Vansant enjoys long walks on the beach, anything to do with her Labradoodle Gordon and frantically getting nothing useful done.
Amy Vansant

23 Responses

  1. will

    Oh amy..lmao i sucked down to many vodka martinis last night an you hit the nail on the head except the husband part for me .. hahahaha well done yet again. where have you been hiding all my life ? 🙂

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  2. Abby

    Are you sure that’s not just menopause? I’ve never had a Manhattan, but after only one vodka gimlet I usually end up sobbing and synchronized swimming in my bath tub. Good times.
    Abby recently posted..Nothing to Sneeze At
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  3. Aiyana

    Somehow, without even seeing the picture, I guessed at who else might be involved in such an evening!

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  4. Stacey

    Whenever I’m around people who are drinking they start talking politics and get shouty. I need to hang out with more entertaining drunks.

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