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21 Responses

  1. Nicole

    Only Mondays? That means 6 days of dirty boobies. That doesn’t seem acceptable. I’d send him a rejection letter.

       1 likes

  2. Lance

    How does he ride two armadillos?

    Also, now I can start making some money on the side.

       0 likes

    • Amy Vansant

      Not surprisingly, I asked him that same question. He said “A foot on each one, standing. Duh.”

         0 likes

      • @bluenotebacker

        Kinda surprised folks having trouble with this one. Tell me you’ve never had armadillo roller skates!

           0 likes

  3. Abby

    I would like to know why he feels you need to wash your boobs only once a week. This disturbs me only slightly more than the fact that he rides armadillos.

       0 likes

    • Amy Vansant

      I’m most confused by “Social Security No: “Never Tested”” Took me a while to get “Date – Really?” but I’m still working on the SSN comment.

         0 likes

      • Abby

        Agreed. I just let that one go, as he was obviously drunk when he applied, therefore negating any need for drug testing before proceeding with the application process. Good luck!

           0 likes

  4. Brandon, from My Own Private Idaho

    If he can only do Mondays, I can come in and help on the weekends (and an occasional weekday when I’m not working).

    I have references!

    I have a resume a mile long. In college, not only was I a boobie washer, but I also did booty buffing on the side.

    The moment when you’ve shined an ass so well you can see your reflection? A proud moment indeed.

       0 likes

    • Amy Vansant

      I’m afraid nepotism has won the day already. Plus he threatened to stop mowing the lawn if I didn’t hire him.

         0 likes

  5. SarcasticNinja

    $500/boob sounds like he’s trying to rob you. Especially given the low fuel costs associated with transportation by armadillo. I would refuse to pay a cent over a hundred for the pair.

       0 likes

    • Amy Vansant

      You have an EXCELLENT point on the money saving armadillos.. thank you for the bargaining chip.

         0 likes

  6. Kristen

    The price is steep considering he added the “ie” in Boobie Washer. $500 per might be reasonable for a Boob Washer….but Boobie? I don’t know if he takes his job seriously enough.

       0 likes

  7. Amy B

    Where are these 2 armadillos parked? I’m a little nervous about this. They’re messy. Everything else seems like pretty standard language…

       0 likes

    • Amy Vansant

      Where DOESN’T he keep them. I’ve found them under the bed, roaming the backyard, in the bookshelves…

         0 likes

  8. Callie's Mariner

    Is this the only application you got? Perhaps you should hold out for a less lazy Boobie Washer.

       0 likes