Amy Vansant - Author

Help me pick a book title…Mother’s day ideas

May 2, 2017

Diskoveries, Fiction, Humor, Women's Humor

Help Me Name Pineapple #5! I'm about half way done Pineapple Port Mystery #5, which I've been calling Pineapple Beach House in my head, but I'm not sure that's the best name. This story revolves around a handf...

Win Fantasy eBooks…And an ugly toe.

Amy Vansant

July 12, 2016

Humor, Women's Humor

14

First, hello to all the cozy mystery lovers who entered my cozy mystery giveaway! I have a bunch of exciting stuff coming up for you (and my regular people) soon (including more free books for all and a cha...

A Lard’s Day Night

Amy Vansant

December 29, 2015

Humor, Women's Humor

11

I hosted Christmas this year and there were a few mishaps. I burnt my arm while leaning into the oven, but on the upside, the burn mark makes it easier to to masquerade as a celebrity chef. I started the turkey...

Slightly Stalky on Audible – Get it FREE

Amy Vansant

November 17, 2015

Humor, Women's Humor

So excited to announce that Slightly Stalky, my romantic comedy, is now available as an Audible! The book is narrated by the brilliant and award winning Christa Lewis, who gave all the fun, goofy charact...

Pineapple Port 2: Pineapple Mystery Box is Here!

Amy Vansant

October 29, 2015

Fiction, Humor, Women's Humor

6

The second book in my Pineapple Port cozy mysteries series is here! Get it on Amazon! Pineapple Mystery Box! When a giant inflatable Halloween witch goes missing, Charlotte’s eager to nab the culprit. Bef...

My First Book Signing Complete with Costumes…

Amy Vansant

September 3, 2015

Humor, Literary Humor, Women's Humor

21

Two months ago I received a frantic phone call from my mother-in-law, Mary, informing me that she'd scheduled a Pineapple Lies book signing at her book club at the end of August and that I'd have to come to Flo...

Bra straps and audio books…

Amy Vansant

August 19, 2015

Humor, Product Reviews, Women's Humor

I had the Bother-in-Law, Gary, and his family over for four days last week for Naval Academy Parents' Weekend. Somewhere between hangovers, Mike, Heather, Gary and I went golfing and returned sweaty and despera...

FREE Romantic Comedy – Mystery Kindle Novel

Amy Vansant

May 18, 2015

Fiction, Women's Humor

6

If you haven't already gotten your hot little hands on a copy of my romantic comedy/mystery Pineapple Lies, you'll be happy to know the Kindle version is FREE today through Tuesday May 19th! It spent most of th...

50th Wedding Anniversary Idea – Balloonageddon

Amy Vansant

April 28, 2015

Humor, Women's Humor

4

What do you get the parents who have everything? Do they have balloons hidden all over their house? Some with faces? I didn't think so. For my parent's 50th I sneaked into their home with the intention...

New Release! Romantic Comedy/Mystery – Pineapple Lies

Amy Vansant

April 9, 2015

Fiction, Humor, Women's Humor

Guess who has a new novel out! (get a free copy for a limited time...) This is yet a new series (I swear I'm working on Angeli 2 and then Stalky 2 next - I will stop starting new series for a while...) The...

And You Can Forget Vacation Sex

Amy Vansant

January 21, 2015

Humor, Travel Humor, Women's Humor

3

My husband and I, of course, never have sex. That would be disgusting. (Ok, that first line was in case anyone from my family reads this. We can continue.) There was a LOT of driving. My husband, Mike...

New Romantic Comedy – Slightly Stalky

Amy Vansant

January 12, 2015

Fiction, Humor, Women's Humor

2

So for all the people who said, "Eh, you're kind of funny, but what's with the homicidal angels? Were you drunk when you wrote Angeli?" (and by people I mean my mother and mother-in-law... and by drunk the an...

The Grade School Boy Who Haunts My Dreams

Amy Vansant

December 4, 2014

Humor, Women's Humor

4

In case anyone's on the fence about whether grade school traumas stick with people, I'd like to share this incredibly embarrassing little ditty. Top to bottom Winner, Glenn, Bobby, Andrea, Me (middle) and J...

My Mother-in-Law Practical Jokes My Husband

Amy Vansant

September 17, 2014

Humor, Practical Jokes, Travel Humor, Women's Humor

5

I recently came back from visiting my Mother-in-Law near Sarasota, Florida, where my husband's favorite hobby is teasing his mother about Florida-retiree cliches. Golf carts, sweat, swimming aerobics, fried bea...

Everyday Superheroes

Amy Vansant

July 9, 2014

Humor, Women's Humor

3

Every other week Marvel or DC Comics has a new superhero movie; young Batman, goofy Batman, moody Batman, old Batman... but people, save your money. There are superheroes all around us! Such as... Super Swipe...

The Tupperware That Wouldn’t Die

Amy Vansant

May 28, 2014

Food & Cooking Humor, Humor, Women's Humor

5

I've got this decision to make and it's killing me. It's one of those "Sophie's Choice" situations, only with less Nazis and more Tupperware.* You know that one Tupperware you refuse to throw out even though...

That’s great slimming advice hope you choke on skinny pants

Amy Vansant

April 23, 2014

Humor, Women's Humor

11

I was doing a little online shopping when I spotted a sale on "shape shifters;" clothes that make you look slimmer than you are. Usually, my "slimming trick" is to just never go out in public and only post 10 y...

Old Lady Death Cake

Amy Vansant

April 16, 2014

Humor, Women's Humor

9

Some people sleep easy at night, safe in the knowledge that when they grow old, their kids will take care of them. Those are the rules: You feed and diaper your child, and when you get old, it's payback tim...

Dealing with a Niece Infestation

Amy Vansant

April 2, 2014

Humor, Women's Humor

1

There's no reason to be ashamed. A niece infestation can happen to anyone. It doesn't mean you're dirty. You just left the door unlocked and now the little buggers are everywhere. Like a glitter snake, shed...

The wall, the wall, the wall is on fire…

Amy Vansant

March 11, 2014

Dog Humor, Humor, Women's Humor

7

So, you know that thing where you're having a cocktail and then the wall catches on fire? THE SCENE: My husband Mike, his brother (the infamous Bother-in-Law, Gary) and I were having cocktails in the livi...