Email This Post HomeProduct ReviewsHeads in Beds Review: How This Asshole Got me Reading Again Amy Vansant April 24, 2013 Product Reviews 14 Comments Heads in Beds is more fun than a room with a view and a suitcase full of stolen Toblerones. Which is exactly how you could spend your next vacation if you take author Jacob Tomsky’s advice. In the tradition of Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential, Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality is an insider’s look at the world behind the frozen smiles on the staff at your favorite hotel. The book is a compilation of personal experiences from author Jacob Tomsky’s time working in the hotel industry – from parking cars to running housekeeping to manning the front desk. In addition to being a fun romp, Heads in Beds is rife with tips on how to treat people in hotels in order to get what you want. Or, if you’re an ass, you might found out why you always seem to get the room without a view. Ok, I know I’m a little behind the times, offering a Heads in Beds review now… This book was all the rage last Christmas, and it had been sitting on my shelf since then. In March I finally picked it up, and damn if Tomsky didn’t get me reading again. I’d been falling behind on reading for fun until I started this book and found myself unable to put it down. Heads in Beds is written in a wonderfully readable, casual tone that makes the experience of reading feel more like sitting down with the author at a bar. By the time I finished, I felt like some snarky friend I used to know from high school had written it. Tomsky’s freewheeling conversational writing tone might rub some gentler folk the wrong way. A quick peek on Amazon’s reviews will show a small handful of people too distracted by profanity to appreciate the book (hence the title of this review). To read some of those reviews, you’d think the book was called Fucking Heads in Fucking Beds, but there really isn’t that much profanity. Overall, I’d have to say old Anthony Bourdain is a much more miserable, sarcastic bastard and he’s got his own show. What more could you ask from a book than to both entertain you and offer tips on making hotels stays more enjoyable? Tomsky lets readers in on industry secrets like the fact that you never really have to pay for in-room movies: They are the fastest thing taken off your bill if you complain. Mini-bar charges aren’t written in stone, either. He goes as far to say you could check into a room, empty the fridge, then ask for a room change (your suitcase full of snack items in tow) and then spend the rest of your vacation in your new room enjoying your ill-gotten gains. This tip made some reviewers crazy, but Tomsky isn’t telling you to steal. If you’re the sort of person who would try this trick, then you’re probably the kind of person who brings dead cockroaches into restaurants to get free meals and you’re already an ass – you didn’t need Tomsky to tell you that. But was I absolutely giggly at the idea of sitting around my room eating ill-gotten Toblerones? Yes! It’s that sort of skewed way of sharing information that makes the book so much fun to read. There are ton of great nuggets, I won’t blow the whole book by reciting them here, the way I’ve blown it for my husband by following him around the house telling him every trick the moment I read it. In addition, I followed Tomsky on Twitter (@JacobTomsky) and he followed me back, which F. Scott Fitzgerald never did (who’s the dick now, F. Scott? Guess the “F” doesn’t stand for friendly, huh? HUH?) and Jake would like you to all know about his short story club called “Short Story Thursdays” which he would love for you to join. (I call him Jake ‘cuz we go way back. Like two weeks. And he says I can. Because it’s his name and everyone calls him that.) Each week ol’ Jake will send you a short story to your inbox, and the stories are not all weird stuff his cousin wrote; they are all classics. All free. So go join the Short Story Thursdays and get Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality if you haven’t read it already! About Latest Posts Amy VansantAmy Vansant is a USA Today and Wall Street Journal Best-Selling author specializing in fun, funny fiction --- even the murder mysteries. Latest posts by Amy Vansant (see all) New Pineapple Port Mystery, New Audio Book, Giveaway & Deals - May 26, 2019 Winners of the name the puppy contest, giveaways and deals - May 17, 2019 Name the puppy in Pineapple 9, BIG giveaway and deals - May 8, 2019 14 Responses beduwen April 24, 2013 The book sounds fabulous. I always tell my DH not to be snarky when he gets pissed off at hotels. I had a feeling it wasn’t just a coincidence that we always seem to get the room by the ice machine. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant April 24, 2013 Nope. You’ll soon see they know ALL the bad rooms! 0 likes Reply Jen Anderson April 24, 2013 I was about to say something about all the business travel I used to do, but now I’m getting flashbacks. But Jeezus H. Fucking Christ on a cracker. Why do people always have to get into such a tizzy over swearing? And then leave online evidence that they have such delicate eyes and ears? I’ve known nuns with stronger constitutions. 0 likes Reply Tiffany N. York April 24, 2013 Ooooh, I love nitty gritty books like this. I read Kitchen Confidential awhile back and really liked it. I bet you’re also one of those who, if you’ve already seen the movie, tells you what’s going to happen before it happens… 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant April 24, 2013 It isn’t super gritty, but it’s real enough and he does curse, so that’s a bonus! Here let me tell you all about it… 0 likes Reply Christian at Point Counter-Point Point Point April 24, 2013 I might have to check this book out. I love reading about behind the scenes stuff, plus I travel often for work so I might also learn a way to score a free Tobleron! 0 likes Reply SarcasticNinja April 24, 2013 Ill-gotten Toblerones are the best Toblerones. Slightly better than ones wrestled from a bear – satisfaction with less mauling. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant April 24, 2013 I’m not a fan of mauling… but I do like taking Toblerone’s from sloths. It’s more of a licking and a really slow clawing… 0 likes Reply Scargosun April 25, 2013 Loved that book! I think I read it in one sitting. 🙂 0 likes Reply Damien April 26, 2013 Just like Kitchen Confidential, this is a great example of a concept that is simple, obvious and cool that people kick themselves for not getting there first. It also makes me think about what I could go behind-the-scenes on. Unfortunately I don’t think anyone would buy the behind-the-scenes look at a university teaching hotdog enthusiast… What’s going to be your behind-the-scenes book? 0 likes Reply Punky Coletta May 4, 2013 This sounds awesome! I love profanity, and I used to be a housekeeper in a hotel for years! Thanks for the suggestion. Can’t wait to read it! 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant May 5, 2013 Oh you should love it then! 0 likes Reply EL May 30, 2013 This books sounds great, will have to read it. I tell the MRs. all the time not to complain at restaurants because it never is a good thing to piss people off. Hotel employees need to give me a free night at the end of the stay- Is this trick in there? 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant May 30, 2013 I don’t know if you’ll get a free night… but you might find out what they’ll do to you if you DO complain… 🙂 0 likes Reply Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Add me to Amy Vansant's Humor Newsletter!