Email This Post HomeHumorNew Audio Book Released, House Hunting in Florida Amy Vansant January 17, 2019 Humor 5 Comments We’re coming for you, Amy… I need one of you to leave your house in Juno/Jupiter Beach, FL, please. Mike and I are in Florida house hunting, which isn’t half as fun as HGTV pretends it is. While my Navy Academy niece and her Navy peeps watch over our house, we’re schlepping around the Juno and Jupiter beaches realizing very quickly we should have done this three years ago. The last house we saw had dolls in it. A LOT OF DOLLS. If we’d liked it, it would have meant the extra added expense of having an exorcist come in, because I’m not living in a house where a case full of dolls once called home. You know they’ll want to come back. The only thing worse would have been a house full of clowns. And clown dolls? Don’t get me started… We’re literally tromping up and down the beaches (we’re big walkers), which are often a little too soft for comfortable walking. Luckily, Mike has feet like snowshoes, so I can fall behind him and walk in his footsteps. And once I walk a mile in his footsteps, I get to judge him all I want, right? Isn’t that how it goes? I filmed this little guy looking like me every time I walk into a room trying to remember what I’m there to fetch… Oh, and PS: there aren’t that many houses in Juno/Jupiter Beach, so if any of you live there please move out and let move in. Thanks for being a trooper. Need a Fun Audio Book? Try the Pineapple Port Mysteries! I just released the FOURTH Pineapple Mystery on Audible if you like audio books! Pineapple Lies: A Pineapple Port Mystery: Book One (Pineapple Port Mysteries 1) AUDIBLE Kindle, Kindle Unlimited & Paperback: Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Amazon AU | Amazon IN | Audible Book one of the laugh-out-loud mystery series from Wall Street Journal and USA TODAY Best-Selling author Amy Vansant. If Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum and the Golden Girls had a baby, it would be the Pineapple Port series! It’s bad enough finding a body in your back yard—especially when foul play is pretty much a certainty. But when you discover the bones are somebody’s long-missing mom, it’s tragic. And if that person is the hottest guy in town, you’ve just made the world’s worst first impression! Pineapple Mystery Box Audible Kindle, Kindle Unlimited & Paperback: Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Amazon AU | Amazon IN Something funny’s going on in this funny Florida Halloween mystery… and it isn’t just the inflatable witch on the roof! When a giant inflatable Halloween witch goes missing in the Pineapple Port retirement community, amateur sleuth Charlotte Morgan’s eager to nab the culprit. But before she can lift a fingerprint, someone threatens to kill a new neighbor who looks like an adorable Pomeranian but possesses a disturbing talent for revenge. Moments later, a stranger demands the return of a mysterious wooden box… or else. Pineapple Puzzles: A Pineapple Port Mystery: Book Three Audible Kindle, Kindle Unlimited & Paperback: Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Amazon AU | Amazon IN The infamous Puzzle Killer stops by Pineapple Port in a mystery both hilarious and heart-stopping! Book THREE of the series that keeps readers (and their spouses) up at night with snorty laughter! Wall Street Journal and USA TODAY Best-Selling author Amy Vansant provides the perfect blend of humor and thrills as amateur sleuth Charlotte Morgan tries to track down a notorious killer. Pineapple Land War: A Pineapple Port Mystery: Book Four ($5 off) Audible Kindle, Kindle Unlimited & Paperback: Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Amazon AU | Amazon IN When your day starts with a man stuck to the top of a sailboat mast, things have to get better, don’t they? Wall Street Journal and USA Today best-selling author Amy Vansant introduces you to even more wonderfully lovable Pineapple Port characters in book four of the hilarious mystery series keeping listeners on the edge of their seats! When real estate tycoon Bucky Bloom is found stuck to the end of a sailboat mast, a land war erupts in Pineapple Port. Amateur sleuth Charlotte Morgan is commissioned to solve Bucky’s murder, but soon finds herself embroiled in a competition masterminded by her boyfriend’s crazy ex, the ever-nefarious Stephanie. More, currently available only on Kindle, Kindle Unlimited and Paperback…for now…AudioBooks coming soon! Pineapple Beach House: (Pineapple Port Mysteries 5) Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Amazon AU | Amazon IN Pineapple Disco: (Pineapple Port Mysteries 6) Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Amazon AU | Amazon IN Pineapple Gingerbread Men: (Pineapple Port Mysteries 7) Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon UK | Amazon AU | Amazon IN GIVEAWAY! Win 20+ Paperbacks! BOOK DEALS & STEALS The Single Daddy Club: Jason, Book 2 & The Single Daddy Club: Reece, Book 3 FREE Jan. 17-21! Desperate Daddy: Widowed police officer Jason Devlin. Taking care of his baby girl is usually a piece of cake–until his housekeeper quits, leaving Jason desperate enough to hire the first qualified person who rings his doorbell. Damsel in Distress: Runaway heiress Katie Smythe. The pampered debutante is about to take on her greatest challenge, her very first job–as a nanny. Doorstep Deal: Jason is thanking his lucky stars that Katie has shown up at his house. She’s the perfect nanny for his little girl–and beautiful beyond belief, leading Jason to rethink his single status. But just wait until he discovers who this nick-of-time nanny really is! REECE The only remaining single guy in the Single Dad Club, Reece Newton. Marriage may be the answer for all his friends, but not for this contented father of one. Of course, the right woman could change his mind… Endangered Beauty Woman in hiding, Maggie Dunlap. When someone ransacked her house and put her life in jeopardy, the lovely lady had nowhere to run—except into Reece’s protective embrace. Eventual Bride? Against his better judgment, Reece offered Maggie a safe haven in his home. Her mere presence changed the lives of father and son more than he ever dreamed possible. But would Maggie ever get the bachelor dad to the altar? Start Date: 12-03-2018End Date: 02-03-2019 Picture Not Perfect (The Not So Reluctant Detectives Book 2) By Dena Haggerty Usual Price: 2.99 Sale: .99 A picture tells a story. But is it the truth?When the police find pictures of Melanie hanging up at her murdered colleague’s house, they’re convinced he was stalking her. Maybe she even killed him. Melanie was not being stalked! And she certainly didn’t kill her supposed stalker – as if. But Mel – always up for a bit of drama – jumps at the chance to go search for the real killer. When Mel’s ex-boyfriend, Owen, discovers her plans, he pulls out all the stops to ensure she’s safe and to win her back. No matter what happens with the murder investigation, he’s not letting her go. With the police setting their sights on Mel, he may need to jeopardize his own career on the police force to protect her. Will Mel find the real killer before the detectives arrest her for murder? Amazon |Kobo Link|BN Start Date: 12-06-2018End Date: 02-28-2019 Lost Angels: A Supernatural & Paranormal Romance Novel (The Lost Archangels Book 0) By Tatenda Creed Usual Price: New Release Sale: .99 Supernatural collides with Mortal instruments and Vampire Diaries. Dare to begin the passionate journey of dilemmas, sacrifice, and an epic love story? Prepare to be addicted. Grab the Prequel, Lost Angels, and unveil a love story like no other. Amazon Start Date: 11-16-2018End Date: 02-16-2019 He was Walking Alone (Zachary Goldman Mysteries Book 4) By P.D. Workman Usual Price: 4.99 Sale: New Release He met with tragedyRichard Harding was walking alone when he was struck by a vehicle and died. A tragic accident that was no one’s fault. But if that was so, then why was his girlfriend so sure that it was intentional homicide? Zachary Goldman is on the case. With Christmas approaching, he is as determined to distract himself from his own troubles as he is to ferret out the truth of Harding’s death. The pieces of the puzzle start to fall into place and Zachary finds that there are more parallels between Harding’s life and his own than he would have guessed. If he doesn’t identify the sinister force behind Harding’s death in time, he could suffer the same fate. Amazon Author Recent Posts Amy VansantAmy Vansant is a USA Today and Wall Street Journal Best-Selling author specializing in fun, funny fiction --- even the murder mysteries. Latest posts by Amy Vansant (see all) Nxt - August 13, 2020 Vegetable *Whatever* Soup – Giveaways and Book Steals and Deals - August 11, 2020 New Book on PreOrder, Giveaways and Deals (Win Kindles) - July 29, 2020 5 Responses Kathleen Garley January 17, 2019 I love dolls. I have some I bought,some my kids bought,some my friend bought and some my husband bought. I actually have 2 big cases of them. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant January 17, 2019 I’m terrified of anything that mimics life! 🙂 0 likes Reply Jennifer January 18, 2019 we just had an offer accepted for a home we’re buying in central Florida. We’ve looked so many homes over the last year being diligent and patient finding a house we’ll call “home” – I totally relate to what you’re saying about the “collectors” homes – YIKES. Good luck on your adventure as I know you’ll find a house too 1 likes Reply Brenda January 18, 2019 I have lived in Florida all my life, you will love it! Be sure to find a home close to the beaches. We do have hurricanes though, keep that in mind. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant January 18, 2019 I grew up on an island so no problem there! 0 likes Reply Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Add me to Amy Vansant's Humor Newsletter!