Email This Post HomeHumorNo Video Skills Theatre Presents: The Guy Who Dumped Adele Amy Vansant February 6, 2013 Humor, Humor Skit Scripts 11 Comments I’d love to make little funny videos, but have neither the time, skill or cast to do so. So, I’m introducing a new series “No Video Skills Theatre” which I’m spelling “Theatre” instead of “Theater” because it is more pretentious that way. Today’s installment: No Video Skills Theatre Presents: “THE GUY WHO DUMPED ADELE DOESN’T GO OUT MUCH ANYMORE” INT. HOUSE – EVENING A party in full swing with people milling about or paired in conversation clumps. A man walks up to another man standing alone against a wall. PETER Hey, Charles! How are you? CHARLES Good. How are you, Peter. PETER Good! Gosh, I haven’t seen you since you were dating… um… what was her name? CHARLES Adele. PETER Oh right. Adele. Mm. Sort of an ugly breakup, eh? CHARLES You could say that. A woman walks up to Charles, angrily slaps him, and then walks away shaking her head with distain. PETER What was that about? CHARLES (shrugs) Happens all the time. PETER So, I heard you settle down? Married now? Another woman walks up. Charles winces and then relaxes. He reaches out to put his arm around the woman. CHARLES Peter, this is my wife, Gwendolyn GWENDOLYN Hi, nice to meet you. PETER (shakes Gwendolyn’s outstretched hand) Hi nice to meet you. So… are you a singer? GWENDOLYN I’m a receptionist. PETER Oh. (mumbles) So no castle. GWENDOLYN What’s that? PETER You’re not rich, own a house like a castle, nothing like that. GWENDOLYN No. PETER Hm. Woman storms up and throws a glass of wine in Charles’ face. WOMAN (screaming at Charles) How could you DO that to her? She LOVED YOU! SHE. LOVED. YOU! (woman sobs and runs off) CHARLES (calmly) Dear, the towel… Gwendolyn reaches into her large purse and pulls out a towel already stained with red wine. She hands it to Charles who uses it to wipe his face and chest. PETER So…do you ever talk to Adele anymore? CHARLES (cleaning himself off) She stopped by unexpectedly the one time. Other than that, no. PETER That new guy of hers is sort of like you. CHARLES No. Not really. He’s better. He’s a lot, lot better. PETER Oh. Well…at least you know she wishes the best for you. CHARLES (stares at Peter for several seconds) Shut up. OK Peter? Just shut up. PETER Right. Well, no worries. Sometimes it lasts in love and sometimes it hurts — CHARLES SHUT. UP. Peter nods and wanders off as another woman walks by and slaps Peter. CHARLES (to Gwendolyn) You were right. Too soon. Think it’s time to go. Gwendolyn nods and they leave. (First seen on Funny or Die) About Latest Posts Amy VansantAmy Vansant is a USA Today and Wall Street Journal Best-Selling author specializing in fun, funny fiction --- even the murder mysteries. Latest posts by Amy Vansant (see all) The Vultures Show Up, Cool Furniture – Book Giveaways and Deals - October 15, 2019 Pineapple Turtles Cover Reveal, Today Show Segment, Giveaway and Book Deals - October 9, 2019 More Kilty Sales, Scardy-Dog, Giveaways and Book Deals! - October 2, 2019 11 Responses Heather Gray February 6, 2013 Hilariuos. I want to be Gwendolyn in the actual low budget theatre production. I have a flip video and acting experience! 🙂 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant February 6, 2013 You’re hired! 0 likes Reply Cadry February 6, 2013 Hilarious! As a big Adele fan (you know, me and nearly every other person on the globe…), this struck me as particularly funny. Poor dude. I especially liked the line, “Sometimes it lasts in love and sometimes it hurts…” 0 likes Reply Lance February 6, 2013 BRAVO! Let’s be honest, whether it’s Carly Simon (You’re So Vain), Patty Smyth *Goodbye To You), Alanis Morisette (You Outta Know, Adele, or Taylor Swift (her entire catalog), being a music to a crazy female musician is a badge of honor. Real people will admire you for dumping a whackjob to settle down with someone that isn’t prone to sleeping with her drummer, doing lines of coke off a Motel Six toilet, or brag about blowing you in a Theatre or Theater. This should be a regualr series. I’d like to play the 10 hockey players You Outta Know is aboot. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant February 6, 2013 Heh, canadians… ha! You know, the service I used to subscribe to your blog died, I have to find another way to have it emailed to me…. thank you for reminding me! 0 likes Reply SarcasticNinja February 6, 2013 My New Year’s Resolution is to not date any famous artistes, to avoid the possibility of being negatively immortalized. So far, success. 0 likes Reply bill major February 6, 2013 i can see why he dumped her, she looks like a hunchback……lol 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant February 6, 2013 Yeah, maybe not the best picture, but she looked “gleefully revenged” so… 0 likes Reply Tracy February 6, 2013 My husband gets a little tweaked when I mention him on my tiny little blog, even in a good way. I can’t imagine what would happen if I wrote a world famous song about him breaking my heart. Poor Charles. Looking forward to the next installment of No Video Skills Theatre. 0 likes Reply Natalie the Singingfool February 6, 2013 Methinks you have a career as a playwright in your future. 0 likes Reply Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd February 12, 2013 It’s only a matter of time before someone sets up a service for shitty boyfriends to inspire young female songwriters. 0 likes Reply Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Add me to Amy Vansant's Humor Newsletter!