How You Send Your Niece to Sweden
My niece is spending her next six months at the Naval Academy in Sweden. She stayed at our house for the few days before she left, and while those of you with children won’t find any of the shocking events that unfolded surprising — I am constantly amazed.
||Step One: Wake up the day she’s leaving to find some sort of Kit-Kat wrapper modern art on the counter. I understand not throwing away your trash, leaving it on a table maybe… but how exactly does it get strewn about like this unless you’re trying to make your aunt’s head explode?|
|Step Two: Realize that once again, she’s made WAY too many chocolate chip pancakes. This was the stack left after she took her share, which is generally equal to her own body weight. The problem is the same analytical mind that makes her a straight-A physics student, also can’t vary from the directions read on the box. Does not compute. So if the box says “Makes pancakes for 150” but doesn’t offer a smaller version of the recipe, she’s helpless to feed less than 150.
Even though I was trying to diet, I was then forced to nibble—rabid squirrel-like—all the chocolate chips out of these.
||Step Three: Find those pancakes abandoned on the table for a few hours.|
|Step Four: Realize you’ll need those abandoned pancakes for energy, because her ginormous suitcases will sit in the perfect nexus of no less than FOUR entrances for those same few hours, making climbing into your bedroom, or office, or her bedroom or the hall… like scaling Mount Everest.||
||Step Five: Take a lovely photo of her with her Uncle Mikey and all is forgiven.
What can you do.
At least you know the girl who generally refuses to eat anything except pasta and pancakes will be faced with pickled herring for the next six months.
You have your little revenge! 🙂
BOOK DEALS & GIVEAWAYS
Start Date: 01-06-2018End Date: 02-15-2018
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Start Date: 01-11-2018End Date: 02-11-2018
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When the crime scene is pure coincidence and there’s no evidence, how do you prove it was murder?
Ella Bridges faces her most challenging investigation so far when the vicar dies suddenly at the May Day Fete.
Start Date: 01-12-2018End Date: 02-08-2018
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By P.D. Workman
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That was what the others all thought.
That was what Ronnie told herself.
Start Date: 01-15-2018End Date: 01-20-2018
The Dragon Orb
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Bakari is a brilliant scholar wizard who’s more at home in a library than a battlefield. Alli is a beautiful young battle wizard whose grace in battl
Start Date: 01-16-2018End Date: 01-21-2018
Alien Alphas: Twenty-Three Naughty Sci-Fi Romance Novellas
By Sara Fields
Fierce warriors. Savage barbarians. Powerful warlords.All ready to claim their mates.Alien Alphas is a collection of panty-melting sci-fi romances featuring dominant alien heroes, penned by New York Times, USA Today, and international bestselling authors. This decadently naughty box set includes twenty-three ALL-NEW, stand-alone novellas full of hot alien alpha males, breathless passion, and reluctant surrender. Take an exhilarating trip beyond the stars with this limited time only bundle that’s sure to leave you turning the pages late into the night.Featured authors: Cari Silverwood, Cynthia Sax, Renee Rose, Lee Savino, Addison Cain, Kallista Dane, Maren Smith, Ava Sinclair, Sue Lyndon, Emily Tilton, Ashe Barker, Korey Mae Johnson, Grace Goodwin, Ivy Barrett, Jane Henry, Jaye Peaches, Katie Douglas, Lili Zander, Loki Renard, Maria Monroe, Megan Michaels, Myra Danvers, Sara Fields, and Sophie KiskerPublisher’s Note: The stories featured in this collection involve MF and MFM pairings. They include spankings and sexual scenes. If such material offends you, please don’t buy this box set.
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