Email This Post HomeHumorWhy You Shouldn’t Mix Manhattans with Wine Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 Humor 23 Comments You wake up and it sounds like there is a tiny woman in your skull screaming at the top of her lungs while she rips out chunks of your brain. You stumble out to find the kitchen and living room covered in empty wine bottles, glasses, playing cards and heartburn medicine bottles. You burst into tears watching Olympic synchronized swimming, which immediately shifts into uncontrollable giggles at how stupid you are. About the time you get that under control, you burst into tears watching an inspirational Nike commercial. You ask your husband to put you down. You check your email and find this photo you sent yourself from the night before of your husband playing knife games with your friend. Please send help. Author Recent Posts Amy VansantAmy Vansant is a USA Today and Wall Street Journal Best-Selling author specializing in fun, funny fiction --- even the murder mysteries. Latest posts by Amy Vansant (see all) Book Release – You want The Girl Who Wants (I promise) - September 9, 2020 My Zoo: Critter videos: Bobcats, Armadillos, Tortoises oh my, giveaway and book deals - August 27, 2020 Pineapple Hurricane Finally 99c, My New Exercise, Win Kindles - August 19, 2020 23 Responses kara August 10, 2012 Wondered why i woke up missing a pinky….. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 Yeah… sorry about that. Does your head hurt as bad as mine does? 0 likes Reply SarcasticNinja August 10, 2012 Just so long as the inspirational Nike message of “Just Do It” doesn’t lead to more tear-fueled knife games. Although actually, I bet a lot of Olympic sports would be more gripping if knives were involved… 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 It was a bunch of older women talking about achieving in sports and then their voices would come out of little girls saying the same things and then *sob!* 0 likes Reply will August 10, 2012 Oh amy..lmao i sucked down to many vodka martinis last night an you hit the nail on the head except the husband part for me .. hahahaha well done yet again. where have you been hiding all my life ? 🙂 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 You have my sympathies. I NEVER used to get hangovers, and I have to say I could have lived without them FOREVER. 0 likes Reply Bailey August 10, 2012 It looks like you had a SENSATIONAL time! 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 Luckily I took a picture to help bring it all back through the fog… 0 likes Reply Abby August 10, 2012 Are you sure that’s not just menopause? I’ve never had a Manhattan, but after only one vodka gimlet I usually end up sobbing and synchronized swimming in my bath tub. Good times. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 So you just waltz over to my blog and call me OLD?! You, sir, are a scoundrel! (imagine me slapping you with a white glove) 0 likes Reply Abby August 10, 2012 I was going to say PMSing or pregnant-another stereotypical narrow perception of emotional women-but I didn’t want to get yelled at for that 😉 0 likes Christian at Point Counter-Point Point Point August 10, 2012 I’m a little hung over so forgive me but did you just say that synchronized knife games are now an Olympic event? I’m tearing up just thinking about it. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 11, 2012 If the goal is to actually HIT the fingers, we are GOLD baby. 0 likes Reply Aiyana August 10, 2012 Somehow, without even seeing the picture, I guessed at who else might be involved in such an evening! 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 11, 2012 I know, she’s nothing but trouble, right? 0 likes Reply iampisspot August 11, 2012 I was so hungover the other week that I cried at a dead bird on the side of the road. Alcohol is evil. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 11, 2012 Absolutely! (She said, drinking a mimosa with one hand and irish coffee with the other…) 0 likes Reply Stacey August 12, 2012 Whenever I’m around people who are drinking they start talking politics and get shouty. I need to hang out with more entertaining drunks. 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 13, 2012 Yeah that doesn’t sound like fun. We play with knives and argue over important things like who’s the best Muppet. 0 likes Reply Scarlett August 14, 2012 LOL!! This post made me so happy!!! xxxx 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 18, 2012 Yea! Love enthusiastic commenters!!! 😀 ((HUGS)) 0 likes Reply Laura August 17, 2012 Oh my god; I’ve been on this ride! 0 likes Reply Amy Vansant August 18, 2012 Disney would be OUT OF BUSINESS if they had rides like that one… 0 likes Reply Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Add me to Amy Vansant's Humor Newsletter!
Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 Yeah… sorry about that. Does your head hurt as bad as mine does? 0 likes Reply
SarcasticNinja August 10, 2012 Just so long as the inspirational Nike message of “Just Do It” doesn’t lead to more tear-fueled knife games. Although actually, I bet a lot of Olympic sports would be more gripping if knives were involved… 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 It was a bunch of older women talking about achieving in sports and then their voices would come out of little girls saying the same things and then *sob!* 0 likes Reply
will August 10, 2012 Oh amy..lmao i sucked down to many vodka martinis last night an you hit the nail on the head except the husband part for me .. hahahaha well done yet again. where have you been hiding all my life ? 🙂 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 You have my sympathies. I NEVER used to get hangovers, and I have to say I could have lived without them FOREVER. 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 Luckily I took a picture to help bring it all back through the fog… 0 likes Reply
Abby August 10, 2012 Are you sure that’s not just menopause? I’ve never had a Manhattan, but after only one vodka gimlet I usually end up sobbing and synchronized swimming in my bath tub. Good times. 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 10, 2012 So you just waltz over to my blog and call me OLD?! You, sir, are a scoundrel! (imagine me slapping you with a white glove) 0 likes Reply
Abby August 10, 2012 I was going to say PMSing or pregnant-another stereotypical narrow perception of emotional women-but I didn’t want to get yelled at for that 😉 0 likes
Christian at Point Counter-Point Point Point August 10, 2012 I’m a little hung over so forgive me but did you just say that synchronized knife games are now an Olympic event? I’m tearing up just thinking about it. 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 11, 2012 If the goal is to actually HIT the fingers, we are GOLD baby. 0 likes Reply
Aiyana August 10, 2012 Somehow, without even seeing the picture, I guessed at who else might be involved in such an evening! 0 likes Reply
iampisspot August 11, 2012 I was so hungover the other week that I cried at a dead bird on the side of the road. Alcohol is evil. 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 11, 2012 Absolutely! (She said, drinking a mimosa with one hand and irish coffee with the other…) 0 likes Reply
Stacey August 12, 2012 Whenever I’m around people who are drinking they start talking politics and get shouty. I need to hang out with more entertaining drunks. 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 13, 2012 Yeah that doesn’t sound like fun. We play with knives and argue over important things like who’s the best Muppet. 0 likes Reply
Amy Vansant August 18, 2012 Disney would be OUT OF BUSINESS if they had rides like that one… 0 likes Reply
